"What Am I Here for?" Memos from the Postpartum Trenches

The more time you spend looking into your son's eyes, the more likely you are to reassess everything about yourself, starting with "What am I here for?" The things you thought you cared about fade away. Your sense of self quiets. "Me" is just so much less important in the big scheme, and especially when the kids are that tiny. Perhaps in a few weeks, when the rhythm of life is manageable again, I'll start to wonder what's next for me. But, for now, living in the moment is the only thing that matters. Living for those precious few minutes when I'm calm and awake and he's calm and awake and we're just staring. Wondering what the future holds.